Take the Hint


“So what’s your favorite dinner food?”

I looked at the man questioning me. There is only one possible reason he wants to know. I didn’t dare respond.

He asked again, “Seriously, what kind of food do you like? You like steak?”

“Uh… I like to fast, actually. Yeah,” I offered him the lamest answer I could come up with. I have already refused invites for coffee, dinner, bowling, and a trip to the movie theater. By no means do I lead this poor man on.

“Oh, you like fast food? Like Burger King or McDonald’s?” he enthused.

“NO!” I started to panic. “No, not fast food… I meant I like to fast – as in, I don’t like to eat.”

I would say ANYTHING to get out of this situation – to cause him to give up and move on. He ignored my hesitant and completely non-informative reply by asking again in a different way. I looked at the seven year-old boy sitting nearby. He had been watching our exchange in silence.

I realized he could be my scapegoat. I smiled at him and said, “What do you like to eat?”

Before he could respond, my interrogator jumped in and countered, “I didn’t ask him! I want to know what you like to eat. I have something up my sleeve.”

Here’s the thing: He’s a very nice man. But he hasn’t a chance in the world. I’ve denied his offers countless times. He cannot take a hint.

I’ve told him I am not interested in a relationship. I turn down each and every date. Recently I turned down yet another dinner invitation – I think it was the fourth one. He asked if I would change my mind if he sent flowers to me at my workplace. I looked him in the eye and declared the gesture would not help. I would still not date him. He shook his head and mumbled something about, “All I can do is keep trying…”

I was flabbergasted. Or you could give up….

How do you react to a man who does not back down after you have blatantly rejected him several times over? I’ve already admitted that he is a nice guy. He is very sweet. I really don’t want to become vicious toward him. Unfortunately, bold and honest rejection is completely ineffective. I have never before met someone so willfully oblivious to my lack of interest. I’m not sure what else to try. Some suggest that I take him up on one of his offers. I cannot bring myself to do that. I believe it would only encourage his pursuit all the more.

In the meantime, I remain polite toward him. And I avoid flirting or anything that could possibly be misconstrued as flirting at all costs. And I pray that the perfect woman will bounce into his life and take his mind off me completely. And quickly.

Anyone else got any ideas? Why won’t this guy take the hint?


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